lino, vino, ivo, dušan

Marre y bore?

Tout est blanc.
La neige tombe en silence.
Les gens ont disparu, les voitures sont sans vie.
La vile a retrouvé la torpeur de l'hiver, enfin.
Calme mais résolue, la neige, telle une mere bienveillante, l'a arrachée d'un sourire tendre a ses précipitations quotidiennes, pour lui tendre une tasse de chocolat chaud.

...

Looks like what I'll learn this year is not what I expected.
Looks like what I'll get instead is way more valuable.
Isn't it what EVS is about?

...

Another thing:
"By far, the most important advice I have given this summer (and the “secret” of how I can actually learn languages) is to not speak English. Please don’t take this lightly. Depending on how serious you are about reaching the best level you can, this decision can make all of the difference. It is extremely hard because it can be very lonely and frustrating not being able to communicate all that you want when there may be so many other expats around ready to chat with you in your native-tongue, but I have to warn you that frankly I’ve met hundreds of aspiring learners who have failed in making much progress because of using English as the language that they socialise in. Lots of people learn languages very well while also speaking English in their spare time, but in my experience they do it much slower than those who are 100% dedicated.

This is why I can learn languages so quickly, and has nothing to do with magical or genetic talents. Not speaking English is a decision you have to make as soon as possible if you want to learn as quickly as possible. Don’t wait until you are “ready”, because you may never consider yourself ready. Just speak!"

I work in Pekarna

Ok.
Things happen.
It never stops.

Don't look back.
Or do.
Go.
On your own.

blabla bullshit
Cut the crap, dusan.

Tuesday (22 dec.) at 15.00, in Gustaf
Content: Zeko
Form: over-sized fluffy head, badge, patch, wikipedia entry, stencil, sticker, toy, fairy-tale, myth... and whatever else coming to our minds

A workshot dedicated to our fucked-up hero Zeko. Express your love and care for our depressed rabbit friend. Come home to Gustaf, be creactive, join Zeko Trip.



Finally, we use Gustaf. We - who are we? New blood pumping through veins of what some people call Pekarna.
I want to see Gustaf filled with energy, ideas, creactivity, people, laughter.

Solar Pulse Concerts in Gustaf are beautiful.
Philosophical discussions in Gustaf are fine. Even when I understand 1/3.
Press meetings (tiskovke) in Gustaf where almost nobody comes are sad and boring.
Total Fusion in Gustaf... I wanted to write that it is bullshit but I will give it one more chance.

We will see. What Zeko Trip will feel like in Gustaf.
And a question for you to think: can you imagine bunch of little kids doing some creative stuff in Gustaf?

What I am trying to express long time. Since I came here.
My point is - I want to work again in the culture center where a day of event feels almost like a holiday.
I want to feel I need, want, have to be there. And the rest of the team, as well. Because we do events that we like. We do concerts that we like. We do parties that we like. With/For people we love (or at least like).

I don't want to be in need of a bouncer. Safe-guard. Who kicks out people who behave violently. It makes me sick.
But I know. Reality is different. People are shit sometimes. But we can work on it. Slowly, day by day.

And one more thing.
I want to feel proud about the place where I work. And
I want to feel proud about all the people I work with.
I don't want to feel ashamed when somebody asks me - what do you do.
I want to feel great, replying

I work in Pekarna.

What is happening?

Lot of things are happening. Every day. Good and bad.

Na primer - moja slovenčšina gre gor. Začal sem sodelati s ljudima iz PUMa - to je program za aktiviziranjo in integracijo mladih oseb kateri neskončili sredno šolo ali so dlogo brez dela. V PUMu delajo na rekonštrukcijo prostorov za mladinski klub. In jaz pomagam s dokumentacijo - sodelam s Lucijov in Samom. Fotografirame kaj drugi delajo. Jaz ih učim nekaj o fotografiranji in oni mene učijo govorit slovensko. Ful dobro, ne? Delam veliki napredek vsaki krat kdaj grem do Pumsterdama.

What is happening?

Na primer - začeli smo skupinsko foto-terapijo. Skupina ljudji kateri skupaj hoču delat nekaj kreativno. Ni samo foto. Vsaki ponedeljek se srečemo, govorimo in delijo z našima idejama. Upam da to je začetek mnogih zanimivih akciji, situaciji, del, diskusijo... 
Ejna z stvar katere smo začeli je every-week foto/draw/music/write/whatever-battle. On every group foto-terapy session, we set a topic and we have one week (until next session) to create some piece about the topic. This week's theme is MILK. You can make a photo, you can draw, sing, write or whatever else you like to do - concerning milk. When we meet again, each of us show what we've done. We can share our viewpoints, we can talk about our inspirations, affect and interact each other's work. 
Besides other stuff, these creations will be content of the zines we are starting to publish and spread in our personal environment. Anyone can join us. Physically or virtually throught our online-group (http://groups.google.com/group/creactive-bastards-of-maribor) - but physicall contact is the main point, don't forget.
This is just a little from what we have in our heads. I am not capable to put it all out in one blogpost. And I do not want. I have to give it to you piece by piece. So you don't experience heart-attack.

Because we are your fucking future! :)

--
Život EVS dobrovolníka je niekedy náročný, ale preto je to taká dobrá skúsenosť. Som šťastný, že som s týmito ľuďmi, v tomto čase a priestore.

pekarna?

Novemberski Beograd

Hej, tu je link od fotk za november :)

Sorry za blog, samo mam ful dela trenutno pa ne utegnem :)
V montaži delam, tam pa ni neta.

Pozdrav,
Sašo

What do I do?

People ask me this question and I don't know what to say. Because it is hard to answer in one sentence. I have been here for six weeks, already.

Now, I will try to answer myself.

I am Pekarna photographer.
I am creative element.

Me and Lucija, we are finishing video report about Skulpture začasnosti for Artyčok.tv.
We started to make badges. For Solar Pulse Music. Others will follow. Our badges are really nice. Each is different, original, specific.

I am meeting more and more people. Who are interested and enthusiastic in many ways.
Photography, for example. I was thinking about making foto workshot but I changed my mind. We will start some kind of regular once-a-week foto group. Open for anyone with analog, digital or no fotoaparat at all. Open mind will be the only requirement.

I am gathering people whose passion is painting. I hope we will touch space we live in, soon. In personal, very subjective but not selfish way.

Community, presso machine, Daria, pancakes, fuck plast, video battle, canvas, calendar, diy, trash, urban adventure, družba, radio, bird perspective, guerilla, low-budget, low-fidelity, people-found-on-street, crowd manipulation, jam, sharing, t-shirts, glass, interactive, light, design, videoclip, fake, dark room, Pečjak, Pekarma, Stanica, family, Budapešť, self, therapy.

You can ask me about any of these words. We can talk. And act. They are merely blips of what I have in (maybe not only ) my mind.
You can even steal my ideas. It doesn't matter to me because I am full of them. It will maybe even make me happy if you will execute some of ideas born in my head. Do it. My ego will shine smiling.

Besides many other things,
I am new open door to Pekarna for those people who don't really like or know this space. Because I am a newbie, an outsider, not tainted by any background, context, local history or interpersonal (sometimes fucked up) relations.

Maybe the question is not What do I do.
But Who am I?

Who are you? Why?

Maybe you are Zeko.

Report from Civil Media 2009

Civilmedia 09, Social & Technological Innovation in Open-Access Media
November 5 - 7, 2009, Salzburg, Austria

report by dusand

Open, alternative, community, free, media, diy - these and many other key words could describe this conference.

Little diy (Do It Yourself) published zines exhibition was the first thing that grabbed my attention. Lot of interesting stuff made by people in US, Germany and so on. I've never thought about doing such things.. but why not?
Inspiring link: http://microcosmpublishing.com


The Emerging Power of Social Media and the Post-Election Violence in Iran (Irfan Raja) 
Presentation about how mobile phones play important role in informing and spreading word about what's happening in Iran and other countries with censored (and not so free) medias. Irfan Raja showed us several examples of videos took by mobile phones who spread around the world mainstream media channels in very short time from the act happened.
He was also speaking how Twitter is becoming more and more important in fast communication about some hot news and issues.

/// For those who don't know Twitter - it is simple and fast internet tool for sharing short messages within its users. You can write a message and all your twitter "followers" will get it immediately. And mutualy - you will get messages from all the members who you follow. Stanica started to use it several weeks ago. It's another social media tool. It can be connected with Facebook. In the future, it looks like quite powerful tool also for doing PR in informal, direct way. If you are interested, come to me and I can show you how it works in 1 minute.

Community Funded Journalism (David Röthler)
This was very interesting for me. David Röthler from Salzburg based Radiofabrik showed us few internet ideas for funding the community (not only) journalism.

http://www.spot.us/
Community portal where citizens of Los Angeles / so-called Bay Area (=San Francisco, probably) can donate 20 or more dollars to help funding particular story. You as a user and member of the community can choose which article you would like to support. You can see how much more money is needed to write an article. After the amount of dollars is collected, they hire professional journalist for writing the story. By this, citizens of community express their interest in particular topic touching space they live in and they can help with small financial support, as well. So they pay someone who write about their community. For them.
The question is if it could work in European envirnoment and with European way of thinking. Maybe yes, maybe not. It's interesting idea, isn't it?

http://www.sellaband.com/
Check this if you have a band and (of course) no money to produce album.
In that case, this portal is dedicated for you. Bands who wants to be produced can register there, show their idea and people can donate support them. Directly, in small (or big) portions. In return, you can get the money (or some other stuff) back if the project you supported became successful.
So far, more than 2,5 milion dollars were already invested for lots of bands who joined this thing - which is quite impressive.

http://kachingle.com
"Kachingle is a way for readers to choose and equitably share
their $5 monthly contribution with the web sites they appreciate the most."
If you have a website with quality content that people like, you can try to get supported by your fans or let's say community. You register to kachingle.com, attach little thingie on your website. Users of this site can click on it and support you in very little amounts of money (like 10 cents for each visit of your website, or 5 dollars each month - it's possible to set it how you want). If many people will support you with little something, you can get interesting amount of support. Oh and 20% of each donation goes to the services (the provider of the website).

This thing can be boxed into crowdfunding or micropayments category if you like boxes and categories. It's opened for anybody.

http://www.kiva.org/
This is something similar - you can lend money to people who try to start their own little business in poor countries. You always see particular person, his profil, what is he going to do and so on... Very sympatic thing. Something like adopting children from Africa - sending money to some exact child. Yeah, it's similar principle.

This guy, this David Röthler, made an interesting note about Bertold Brecht's Radio Theory. He compared it to Web 2.0 which was inspiring for me. I know very little about Brecht's Radio Theory but this made me want to know more. I will find some info about it. Or if you know something about it, tell me.


History Commons (Daniel Erlacher/Elevate)
They say it was a workshop but nowadays, people call workshops any kind of stuff. For me, it was more an interactive informal presentation. But whatever. It was not bad at all.
http://www.historycommons.org is run by american non-profit organization. "The website is a tool for open-content participatory journalism."
The thing is that there are editors who write, make compilations of facts from books, news, media, basically all kinds of information channels with aim to make a bigger picture of what's going on in our world. This thing should be seen as a new way for writing history. They are just facts, no opinions.
You have entities (persons, organizations,...), timelines of some historical (presence is history as well) events.
It's edited by a bunch of editors (mainly US), so it's not like Wikipedia where basically anybody can edit the content.

///One little personal advise from me - don't consider Wikipedia to be some kind of serious source of information. It can be abused, misused for someone's purposes or intentions. Wikipedia is nice idea but a bit utopic. In this world. Because if you want to have relevant source of information, it has to have an author. Wikipedia has no author, you can't refer to anybody.

So, History commons wants to put the news into perspective. You can see lots of facts from different sources which should provide as objective (if we can say that) overview as possible.

A problem can be editors - who choose them? Who decide who will add and edit content on this website? Daniel Erlacher doesn't have deep insight about how it works in the team of people editing the portal. But as far as he knew, his impression was that those people do it for objectivity itself, for having a bigger picture of what's going on, without any secondary intentions. But human element is always the thing, as we all know.

And of course - this idea is ran under Creative Commons. (http://creativecommons.org/)


Social Innovations in DIY Publishing: Print-On-Demand Technology and the rise of Indie Community Authorship (Deborah Withers)
I missed a presentation that initiated my interested in this conference in the very beginning. Anyway, it was about Print-On-Demand. If you want to publish something and you don't have much money, it's one of the possibilities for you. Print on demand means that you print that many books how many buyers you have. You don't have to print 500 or 1000 books because the big printing house can do it cheap (anyway, you don't have money for so many prints and you are not sure if you will sell it). You just print how many orders you have. So each printed book has its concrete customer. So you will sell all the stuff you have printed. I think it's usually digital print, so it's not so badly expensive. I have to study this a bit more to get more exact information.

In Other Worl(d)s: An Exercise in Collaborative Writing (Tea Hvala)
Tea Hvala is a cool person involved and active in many things in Ljubljana, especially Metelkova mesto. With other people, she organizes international queer/feminist festival Rdeče zore (Red Dawns / Die Rote Zora) every march.
She led a workshop of (collaborative) team writing, with focus on science-fiction genre. Imagine 6 people who set up characters and general topic or setting of the story and each of them starts writing. After 10 minutes, each of them pass his paper to the neighbour and continue writing in someone else's story. You interact with other people's writings, characters, storyline. The process is finished when every people comes to every participant. The results can be very colorful, amusing, innovative and open-minded texts. We were thinking about mixing the languages of writing but we left it for next time maybe. You can check the stories we wrote here.

inspirating links:
http://www.rdecezore.blogspot.com/
http://prepih.blogspot.com/






fotos:

dusand
&
tea hvala
Addicted2Random (Markus Brandt, Republik der Sehnsucht)
Markus Brandt, guy from Radiofabrik presented us his music making machines. He programmes this software which randomly creates/generates music. He is going to put it online to the http://www.radiofabrik.at site in a week or so, so you will be able to listen to 24/7 (nonstop!) randomly computer-created live music. Each of his "music machines" play different kind of music. In the future, he is going to connect several machines into.. let's say orchestra of software musicians. Because each machine represents one musician. We can say it like that. Yes.
Or it will be even possible to make it interactive with human musicians. I consider this as quite good project with lots of potential.
The music itself actually sounded good.

Participatory culture and technology in on- and offline networksThe last thing I attended to was a presentation of three people:

Tea Hvala presented festival Rdeče Zore and how they work inside the organizational team and how they network with our activists within feminist and queer scene in Slovenia, Balkan, Europe.
http://www.rdecezore.blogspot.com/

Sonja Prlic (Austria) presented 3d online game called Frontiers which should in an informal way advertise and open the topic of crossing borders, migration and refugees. Very interesting, very innovative approach and quite attractive form for young people.
http://www.frontiers-game.com/

Rosa Reitsamer (Austria, Wien) was talking about online database and portal of gender and ethnicity orientated music and their open space with the similar focus of activities in Wien - aRtmosphere.
http://www.digmeout.org

Fotografr's two messages of the day

FAK FLASH!
Don't flash if you don't really have to. Or at least, think twice before using it. I know... "bad light" blablabla. But if you REALLY need to use the flash to make a picture, use it in appropriate, emphatic extent. If you are foto-dokumenting some public event, a big external flash doesn't make you a good fotografr. You shouldn't be seen. You have to try to be silent, stealth. As less obvious and visible as possible. Even clicking of the shutter pisses me off.

So keep on your mind that everytime you flash into someone's eyes, you are making (culture, social, whatever) experience less comfortable for him. You are fucking him in quite a direct way. Yeah, fuck you - fotografrs with (big) flash. I say - rather naturally and intimately experienced moment for audience than decently-exposed photos of the event. People are living now, not in the pictures. That's my philosophy as a fotografr. I can discuss it with you further anytime.


Another thing:
FAK "CAMERA"!
English language is wrong with this. Because it says 'camera' but it wants to say 'fotoaparat'. Camera, kamera is for making videos, films. Slavic people, we all understand this. So I suggest you to stop using word 'camera' if you are talking about appareil de photographie. Jaz delam slike s fotoaparatom in filmi s kamerou.
Anyway, I am wrong with this as well, because camera is latin word. But who cares. It's a dead language.
And they are just words, anyway.

THIS IS A CALL OUT // BUT I AM NOT A CALL BOY

Sunday

Bambi Molesters, Demolition Group. I was lucky to experience concerts of these two legends (which I didn't know before, of course). They were very good. I recommend.

But after lot of loud music, it is always nice to wake up on Sunday and look out of the window. To see this..

Tisti stvari vidim z okna.

Vselitvena!

12. oktober 2009:

Pozdrav!

Javljam se vam ! :)

Žal še nisem imel časa, da bi kaj napisal na blog oz. uploadal slike, samo bom probal to urediti ta teden.

Trenutno delamo na festivalu Slobodna Zona, kmalu bo tudi DisPatch.
Redno tudi obiskujem tečaj srbščine.

Je kr dosti dela, samo je fajn.

Hvala vsem, res se imam super in uživam v tem, kar delam.

Upam, da se kmalu vidimo!
Kdaj pridete na obisk?

Lep pozdrav,
Sašo

Sašo na ulici:

Pišem srpsko:

Kos pizze za 50 centov:

Blok:

Hypocrite's blabla

Be independant. 
Think and act.
Rely on nobody.

Do what you want.
Do what you know.
Do what you want to know.

Feed your soul and body.
Listen to others.
Don't follow them.

Criticize everything. 
Yourself in the first place.

Take radical changes of your mood as chances to see same things in different light.
Learn and teach.

Play.
Break rules.
Use words only as tools.
Avoid fools.
Do not be cool.

Act and reflect your actions.

Mavrični Tel Aviv

Tel Aviv se rad predstavlja kot pisano mavrično mesto, kjer skupaj v harmoniji živijo ljudje različnih ras (Judje iz Evrope, Bližnjega Vzhoda, severne Afrike, celo etiopski Judje), različnih verstev (Judje in Arabci) in spolnih usmerjenosti. Sploh so tukaj vsi tako odprti in tako tolerantni, vsi se imajo radi, se držijo za roke in ob petkih zvečer opazujejo, kako mavrični prašički letijo proti sončnemu zahodu.

Dejstvo je, da v Tel Avivu res živijo vsi ti ljudje, tukaj je res zelo pisano, ni pa vse ravno tako lepo kot bi to želeli prikazati Izraelci. Vendar nimam namena govoriti o vseh vrstah diskiminacije med Judi samimi ali diskriminaciji do Arabcev in homoseksualcev (pred nekaj meseci je neznanec vstopil v dnevni center za homoseksualno mladino in streljal, umrla je 16-letna punca in fant, star manj kot 30). Ta teden sem na poti domov videla prizor, ki je krasno orisal situacijo v tem pisanem Tel Avivu. Žal nisem mogla takoj fotografirati, pa naj opišem, kako je zgledalo:

Pločniki v Tel Avivu so relativno široki, brez težav lahko po njih hodi tudi več ljudi vzporedno (ne tako kot pri nas). Ko sem tako hodila domov, mi pridejo nasproti trije možje (kako pravljično). Na levi strani je hodil zblazneli brezdomec, oblečen v umazano in strgano bundo (pri 35°C), v eni roki je imel kebab, ki ga je bog ve kje izprosil, v drugi pa pločevinko kokakole. Na ves glas je kričal stvari v ruščini, ukrajinščini ali kakšnem podobnem jeziku in pri tem tako krilil z rokami, da je kokakola špricala povsod okrog. Ob njem (v sredini) je hodil ortodoksni Jud – tisti tapravi, oblečen v črnino, z velikim črnim klobukom pa dolgo belo brado in kodri. V roki je imel žepno verzijo Biblije, v katero je nepremično bolščal in pri tem zelo na glas molil ter kimal z glavo. Prepričana sem, da mu je bilo neprijetno in je želel čimprej vstran, pa ne zaradi zmešanega brezdomca, temveč zaradi možakarja (?) na desni strani. Tam je namreč hodil/a transvestit, ampak tak taprav, kot jih v Sloveniji podnevi ponavadi ne vidimo. Mišičast moški z dolgimi lasmi, make-upom in šminko, sončnimi očali, v oprijetem topu in mini krilu z visokimi petkami. V rokah je imel vsaj pet vrečk z oblačili, ki jih je nosil kot da bi hodil po Peti aveniji v New Yorku, pri tem pa se je preko bluetooth slušalke zelo glasno pogovarjal z nekom o včerajšnji zabavi (Izraelci so zmerom precej glasni).

Trije moški torej, ki ne bi mogli biti bolj drugačni drug od drugega, z ramo ob rami hodijo skupaj po ulici v Tel Avivu. Res je, živijo v istem mestu, hodijo po istem pločniku, včasih celo istočasno, ampak drug drugega prezirajo in če se le da, ignorirajo. Vsi govorijo drug mimo drugega, nihče ne posluša in ne poskuša razumeti. Skupnega imajo samo nekaj: vsi so na svoj način zmešani.

Druga plat mavričnega Tel Aviva se kaže v četrti, kjer živim, najbolje kar v osnovni šoli, ki stoji nasproti mojega stanovanja. V to šolo namreč še ni stopila judovska noga. No prav, učitelji so judje, ampak verjetno tisti, ki jim na pedagoški ni šlo najbolje. Ker živim v gastarbeiterski četrti (južni del mesta), hodijo v to šolo gastarbeiterski otroci. Veliko temnopoltih, ki so prišli s trebuhom za kruhom iz Slonokoščene obale, Malija, Nigerije, veliko beguncev iz Sudana, po drugi strani pa veliko Azijcev, predvsem Filipincev, ki jih v Izraelu izkoriščajo kot negovalce starejših občanov. Precej je tudi ljudi iz Južne Amerike, tu pa tam pa se najde tudi kaka zelo revna ruska družina (v Izraelu je več kot milijon Rusov, vendar imajo državljanstvo in ponavadi stanujejo v boljših četrtih). V tej šoli pridejo skupaj otroci vseh teh pisanih narodnosti, vseh teh različnih navad in verstev. In na koncu se morajo nekako učiti pa tudi sporazumevati in družiti. Prav res zabavno je gledati dva Afričana pa Mehičana in tri fantke iz Filipinov kako se med igro košarke v hebrejščini prepirajo o tem ali so to bili koraki ali ne.

Ne vem, kdo je zmagal, prav gotovo pa vem, da so se imeli fino. In prav tukaj, v tem umazanem in zanemarjenem predelu Tel Aviva, se skriva tista prava pisanost, ti otroci, pritepenčki iz vseh koncev in krajev, se v jeziku, ki jim je vsem tuj, najboljše razumejo. Ja, pisanost Tel Aviva se pač kaže v vseh barvah revščine.

Špela

"Šal dole!"

Yeah, yesterday was a strange day. Some people shouted at me because of my white-green scarf I was wearing: "Šal dole" - (Put the scarf away). They thought I am Ljubljana footbal team fan. And Maribor "football fans" are not friends with Ljubljana "footbal fans".

But I was wearing it because the weather was cold. I got this scarf as a goodbye gift from my friends in Žilina - a night before I came to Maribor. The colors are just accidental.

If I would have more guts, dignity and kilos, I would keep wearing it. But I am not a conflict type. I am not good at physical opinion exchange and I hate violence.

Dumb people like these are everywhere.
Funny and sad.

A Death came to me today

Cadillac Face. Creative and complex persona. I would like to call him a friend but I don't know him that much. Or better say I didn't. He is gone now. He made his choice. I hope he feels better now. Nobody can imagine someone else's inner world. So be it. Anything.

I felt close to him even I didn't know him deeply. But I could feel much out of him. I liked his music.

Cadillac Face died,
Committed suicide,
Hope he's better now.

Fak Fotošop

However we use it so much (and most of us illegaly, hehe), there are some moments when we can show the finger to this program.

For example, yesterday was the case. The task was - to design dvd case cover for Pekarna promo dvd. As cheap as possible (motto: zero is the best budget) and as fast as possible.

Step 1: We reviewed what we have or what we don't have. We have no plastic cd cases.

Step 2: Okay. We took a look around us. Pekarna and any other environment where (creative) people live and work is crowded with various kinds of trash or useless things that just wait to be used or thrown away as piece of junk. And of course, every-day tools and things that we use in our work.

Step 3: Idea - karton. There is always some carton-box that you can rebuild into something... higher. For example - super sexy cd cases.

So the plan is: karton, black stage tape, pen and nice hand-writing. And Pekarna stamp, naturally.

Blablabla. Long story short.

In the beginning, we were thinking of designing some nice cd cover case in photoshop that we would later print and put into plastic thing. But this low-budget, good-looking, enviroment-friendly idea caught, so we could and we happily did skip aaaall the computer(shit)work. Because we suck at Photoshop.

So what? For sure, it would be another small lesson for us. But we like to answer the challenge of doing good old-fashioned manual work - if there is occasion and situation. And IDEA. Yeah, let's go analog.

If we would do it photoshop, I am sure the final result would not look so good and we wouldn't be so satisfied with our job.

Message of today ego-blog: do not be afraid of things you are bad at, use them for your growth. Take them as creative challenge to improve yourself. Let it mean anything.

Use the trash inside and around yourself.

We work in mysterious ways.

(dusan, lucija)

Ventilacija

Why is it good to write just for yourself? What's the meaning of taking photos without using them anywhere? Is it useless to draw something and never show it to anyone?

Sometimes I got this feeling of emptiness, low effectivity, senselessness. I feel I should do just things that have exact, particular meaning, sense or purpose. But this is wrong.

It's not bad to create something with no aim. If it makes me feel alive and happy and capable to actually do something then it is great. To do such thing. If nothing more, than I take it as an exercise. Training. A lesson in which I improve my creative skills. And experience I gained during this "senseless" activity can (and will be) used in a real-life situation that I might never think of happening.

Moreover. There are cases when some good idea emerges from totally senseless activity. Yeah. 

And I don't know why I am writing about this. Because for lot of people, this is clear and they don't need to think about it more. But I guess I need to re-assure myself again. So, today message for Dušan is: Do whatever you want if it makes you feel better (and others not worse).

Punk country

Don't take this post too seriously.
But I think that Slovenia people have quite punk soul.

Of course - I am generalising.
But who cares?

There is a railway crossing under (re)construction Ob železnici, near Pekarna. Workers work there. Heavy metal hardcore machines included. And people cross it no matter how big holes they tackle or how they step into workers job. But the workers are okay with it. They don't look nervous. It seems interactions like these are very usual, on daily basis.

And I want to say - I like it. It looks grotesque. It makes me smile. In Slovakia, the workers would swear to people - "why the fuck are you going through this spot when I am working right here?!" (maybe it's too exaggerated and of course there are exceptions).

But I can see a difference. And I like this punk way of doing things. And behaving.

+386 (0)30 334 966

This is my new phone number. I am opened to various kinds of contact and communication. (Ignoration is also one way how to communicate. hehe)

Yesterday, I spent whole morning by cleaning the kitchen. On a first sight, it didn't look so bad but on the second look - it was filthy as hell. And I was surprised by myself. Usually, I don't care much about cleaning the place so much. Maybe I am getting.. older?

Or like Lester Burnham said "It's a great thing when you realize you still have the ability to surprise yourself."

Oh - and if you will call me, probably the first thing you will hear from me will be something like "moja slovenščina je slaba, govorte pomalu". But maybe there will be another surprise.

duš.

Ime mi je Špela in včeraj me je opeklo sonce

Ime mi je Špela in včeraj me je opeklo sonce. Letos je jesen res lepa in relativno topla, ampak da bi me opeklo sonce ob kostanjih in moštu? Mogoče na trgatvi? Bolj malo verjetno. Opeklo me je včeraj na plaži v Tel Avivu. Tukaj sem že skoraj teden dni, prostovoljno delam pri organizaciji Windows for Peace. Moje prostovoljno delo poteka v sklopu projekta Evropska prostovoljna služba, sem pa me je poslala Pekarna-magdalesnke mreže, zato tudi pravkar berete moj blog na tej strani. Potrudila se bom, čimbolj redno pisati, kaj počnem in kaj se mi dogaja. Zaenkrat nekaj osnovnih podatkov.

V Izraelu bom ostala do poletja, v tem času bi rada pomagala organizaciji Windows ter drugim, ki se trudijo, da bi v Palestini končno zavladal mir. Organizacija Windows se zavzema za izraelsko-palestinsko sodelovanje, v okviru njihovega programa se enkrat na mesec dobivajo otroci in najstniki iz treh skupin izraelske družbe: izraelski Judje, Palestinci, ki živijo v Izraelu, in Palestinci iz Zahodnega brega. Skupaj imajo delavnice, okrogle mize, kjer se pogovarjajo o družbenih in političnih temah, in izmenjujejo izkušnje. Med tem se tudi spoprijateljijo, kar je v bistvu cilj projekta - najstniki se med seboj spoznajo in ugotovijo, da tisti "drugi", ''sovražnik'', kot ga kličejo po televiziji in v časopisih, v bistvu ni nič drugačen, da je samo zmeden najstnik, z enakimi težavami, enakimi vprašanji in z enakimi željami po življenju v miru. Najstniki na delavnicah o svojih pogovorih pišejo članke ali pisma svojim prijateljem iz druge etnične skupine. Ti članki in pisma so na koncu objavljeni v obeh jezikih, arabščini in hebrejščini, reviji Windows, ki jo delijo v osnovnih in srednjih šolah. Na ta način tudi drugi otroci in najstniki, ne le tisti neposredno udeleženi v delavnicah, spoznajo drugo stran zgodbe in vidijo da je prijateljstvo z "drugo" stranjo možno.


Drugi projekt organizacije Windows je skrb za skupnost v kateri živijo udeleženci njihovih delavnic. Želijo, da se skupnosti v Tel Avivu, Jaffi, Betlehemu, Tul Karemu in Jeninu povežejo, da postanejo bolj enotne, zato prirejajo predavanja in predvajajo filme. Na te dogodke pridejo starejši člani skupnosti, starši, tete in strici otrok, ki sodelujejo pri delavnicah. Kasneje se tudi oni sestanejo z drugimi skupinami in tako skupaj gradijo most razumevanja. Windows v svojem centru v Tel Avivu prav tako zbira humanitarno pomoč, ki jo nato razdeli med pomoči potrebne v begunskih centrih na Zahodnem bregu.

Moje delo tukaj je zelo zanimivo, zaenkrat pomagam v centru v Tel Avivu, kjer pripravljamo delavnice, organiziramo humanitarno pomoč in gostimo srečanja judovske skupine mladih novinarjev. Konec tedna odhajam na skupno izraelsko-palestinsko delovno akcijo, kjer bomo urejali nov center za aktivnosti lokalne skupnosti, naslednji teden pa se bo začel z dostavo humanitarne pomoči v begunsko taborišče v Betlehemu.

Špela Gašparič

19034890

We need a bill written for Pekarna for every single thing we buy as volunteers from part of our money that we get from Europe. I call this beaurocracy. I didn't know this part of Slovenia.
And our organization can't just hand us the money in cash - from hand to hand. We need bank accounts.Interesting. And bit bothering. But.. whatever.

And on Sunday, we went to Maribor (flea) market. I have never seen so much junk on one place. Lot of food, textile, some interesting crap and some totally useless junk. I guess people are able to sell (and buy?) everything.
But we have seen some really interesting nazi stuff. Paul was interested in Hitler vinyl. But when he heard the price, he ceased to be interested. He is not keen fan of nazi collections.
But he bought some mushrooms. They were good.
I didn't buy anything.
I was just staring at things.

We are here

Dušan in Paul. Mi sme tukaj... is that correct?

Paul arrived on Monday, Dušan on Thursday. We have entered our new living space and started to settle in. We accept any kind of (friendly) visits on Ljubljanska 19A, second floor, flat number 9. In case you have some old stereo system (speakers, amplificator, gramophone) that you don't need, we would use one. 

We are looking around Pekarna and Maribor, talking about our ideas what we can do here, how we can interact with people, environment and so on. So we hope we will be usefull here for you, people in this space. It will be nine months of mutual learning and teaching, so see you around.

Paul & Dušan

Self-experiment

My departure and my arrival. Approaching fast. In last few days, I got a feeling like I am leaving the best people, best places, best situations and conditions of my life. I am leaving safe world of my family, Stanica, friends, activities I am doing. I am stepping into different space. New people, new language, place and habits. Of course, I don't leave for good but anyway... it's a strange feeling.

In last few weeks/months, I talk about my departure much - always full of enthusiasm, with a sparkle in my eyes. Not realizing how big impact it will be.
Full of imaginations, expectations, naivity. And now, I got a bit scared because it is actually going to HAPPEN. No more talking and thinking. Acting.

It's like when you talk about something you want to do since so long and then the moment comes where you actually have to do it.
This is it. Moment of truth.

I talk/think too much and act too little. Je suis plein de merde. One of my friend told me last week: "Dusan, you should think 2/3 less and act 4/5 more." He is right. I know. I've been thinking much about it. Hehe.

Maybe it's just another experiment of mine.
Self-experiment.
We will see the results.

Barbara Škander goes EVS

Barbara Škander je kot prostovoljka Evropske prostovoljne službe 15. 9. 2009 odpotovala na enoletno gostovanje v Leipzig (Nemčija) v organizacijo GeyserHaus. Pozanimali smo se, kako se je ugnezdila, pa nam sporoča:

"...Hvala lepa za lepe zelje in voscila. … Danes se pripravljamo na romski vecer, kjer bo obilo glasbe, plesa, kasneje pa se nemski otroci pripravljajo nekaj za glasbeno obarvani vecer. Mislim, da mi bo tukaj vsec, oz. mi je ze sedaj. Z Oliverjem pa sva prav danes govorila, kako bom zacela zbirati ideje, da jih bom realizirala s skupino otrok in pritegnila njihovo pozornost. Povedal mi je tudi, da bi bilo dobro ce bi se povezala s kaksno kulturno organizacijo v Sloveniji, ki se zanima za tovrstne projekte, delavnice, kot so v Geyserhausu. Sama sem mu povedala, da na ta racun lahko pisem kaksni organizaciji kot so … Poleg teatra pa so se likovne aktivnosti in … Ne vem sicer kaj naj jim napisem, nedvomno pa bi bilo dobro omeniti kaj pocnem in na kaj moram paziti, da bo vse skupaj dobro izpadlo in bodo otroci motivirani za aktivnost, ki se bo odvijala…. Dobro - to je moje delo. Obljubila sm mu, da se bom lotila tovrstnih projektov. Imam veliko idej - vse je le potrebno se organizirati in spraviti skupaj.
Lepe pozdrave v Maribor.. in smo na liniji."

Barbara

Head full of head full of head full of...

So many ideas and so little I-don't-know-what. This is my problem. Lot of things running throught my head mostly without any material response.

An idea, a thought.
Okay - sounds good.
But... never mind.

Another idea, another thought.
Nice, I could do this.
But... hmm. No.

Another one. And another one. And so on.

This is how it feels often in my brain. Pixies were right asking "Where is my mind?".
It is depressive to discover that I have so many things on my mind but I am not able or capable to execute at least part of them. But all I can do is to carry on. Never give up. This will probably bother me until I die. But I can fight it and perhaps "the meaning of life" is involved in this topic somehow.

I need help. Something or better someone who would push me forward. One kick in the ass, one step forward. Wise saying from Romania. Motivation, activation, impulse. 
Sometimes, just a very small thing can turn me on to start to DO the thing. But it is usually tough fight against myself. I don't know. Maybe they are all just excuses. A need of some external force to activate me? No. It is just in my head. Nobody can see it.

Cut the crap, Dusan.

I am thinking about what I will do in Pekarna. I don't know exactly. I have some ideas. I have some expectations and imaginations. When I come in October, everything will be different. Reality will be much more different from what I imagine in my head. Anyway, I look forward. Give it to me. Everything. And I give all I can back to you.

Striking workshop - French people teach Slovak/Sloven people how to demonstrate. How to fight for your right! How to set cars on fire. Sous les pavés la plage. Paul? (I don't know the evs-guy yet but he has to have striking in his blood. He is French, for Christ sake!)

Interdisciplinary-workshop // fake events - photo?video?dance?acting?scenography?light?design?music?film_workshop for photographers, cameramen, dancers, actors, set designers, light designers, graphic designers, musicians, directors who will work/teach/learn hard to make an event look like it happened. But it did not. Or it did in a way.

External output: photo/video/audio/text reports.
About great fucking concert that you (for sure and unfortunately) missed. Because you didn't know about it happening.
About vernissage of an exhibition of  awesome painter who didn't even know he had been there.
Anything. Fake.
Internal output: experience, knowledge, gained skill for people who did it.
Screwing and messing with the past, reality, truth, events, memories, future.

You don't understand?! So what? Me neither. It won't happen anyway.

Or?